Recaps (PPV/Event)WWE PPV 2019

[PPV Recap] ‘WWE SummerSlam 2019’ – Rollins vs. Lesnar, Kofi vs. Orton

Date: August 11, 2019
Venue: Scotiabank Arena (Toronto, Ontario, Canada)
Commentators: Various

Read on for a LIVE recap of the 2019 SummerSlam, featuring Seth Rollins vs. Brock Lesnar for the Universal Championship, Kofi Kingston vs. Randy Orton for the WWE Championship, Trish Stratus’ retirement match, and much more!

CHAMPIONS

  • WWE CHAMPION: Kofi Kingston
  • WWE UNIVERSAL CHAMPION: Brock Lesnar
  • WWE UNITED STATES CHAMPION: “The Phenomenal” AJ Styles
  • WWE INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPION: Shinsuke Nakamura
  • WWE CRUISERWEIGHT CHAMPION: Drew Gulak
  • RAW WOMEN’S CHAMPION: “The Man” Becky Lynch
  • SMACKDOWN WOMEN’S CHAMPION: Bayley
  • RAW TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS: The OC (Luke Gallows & Karl Anderson)
  • SMACKDOWN TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS: The New Day (Big E & Xavier Woods)
  • WWE WOMEN’S TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS: Alexa Bliss & Nikki Cross
  • WWE 24/7 CHAMPION: R-Truth(?)

LINEUP

  • SUBMISSION MATCH: Becky Lynch [c] vs. Natalya for the RAW WOMEN’S CHAMPIONSHIP (**1/2)
  • Goldberg vs. Dolph Ziggler (NR)
  • AJ Styles [c] vs. Ricochet for the WWE UNITED STATES CHAMPIONSHIP (**3/4)
  • Bayley [c] vs. Ember Moon for the SMACKDOWN WOMEN’S CHAMPIONSHIP (**3/4)
  • Kevin Owens vs. Shane McMahon (***)
  • Trish Stratus vs. Charlotte Flair (****)
  • Kofi Kingston [c] vs. Randy Orton for the WWE CHAMPIONSHIP (*)
  • Finn Balor vs. Bray Wyatt (**1/2)
  • Brock Lesnar [c] vs. Seth Rollins for the WWE UNIVERSAL CHAMPIONSHIP (***1/2)

*****

-After the opening video we go live to the arena where THAT’S HONEST TO GOODNESS PYRO. WEL-COME BACK, WEL-COME BACK! Michael Cole welcomes the home audience, flanked by his usual RAW co-commentators Corey Graves and Renee Young. Graves’ shirt looks like it’s glowing on its own and I want it. Oh dip we’re getting the RAW Women’s Championship match first, but not until we see a video recapping their feud! Good hype video, but Natalya getting chance number 5000 does nothing for me personally.


SUBMISSION MATCH
“The Man” Becky Lynch [c] vs. Natalya for the RAW WOMEN’S CHAMPIONSHIP

Slaps to start, Lynch unloads on Natalya in the corner. Lynch plays to the crowd, giving Natalya time to fight back and drop her with a spinning clothesline. Lynch sends Natalya into the corner and connects with a spin kick to the guts and a Bexploder. Lynch goes for a cross armbreaker, Natalya clasps her hands together so Lynch transitions into a triangle choke. Lynch deadlifts her and tries to power out with a slam but Lynch hangs on. Apparently there is no rope break in a submission match. News to me. I guess I don’t pay a lot of attention. They battle to the apron, Lynch with a guillotine and Natalya uses the barricade to break, then again to add insult to injury with a giant swing. Natalya goes to work on Lynch’s left knee to weaken it for the Sharpshooter, including a suplex INTO the ropes. Lynch belts Natalya with a European uppercut, Natalya floats her to the apron. Lynch tries a kick, Natalya catches it and wrenches it across the middle rope, then locks in a Sharpshooter while sitting on the top turnbuckle! Eyyyy nice. Lynch manages to escape and bounces Natalya’s head off the English announce table and the ring steps, giving her time to recover from the damage done to her knee. Natalya clutches her left arm and now both women’s injuries are convenient to their finishers. Back in the ring Natalya meets Lynch on the top turnbuckle and connects with a glorious superplex. Both women are out. Natalya tries the basement dropkick, Lynch counters into the Sharpshooter! Natalya uses her weight, launching the back of Lynch’s head into the middle buckle. Lynch tries a jump kick, Natalya sends her to the mat and applies the Disarm-HER. Lynch rolls through, Natalya turns it into the Sharpshooter. Lynch fights through the pain and drags herself to hang outside of the ring. Natalya lets go, drags her back in, Lynch blocks the Sharpshooter and wrenches in the Disarm-HER. Natalya fights for a little bit but it’s too much and she taps.

Becky Lynch [c] defeated Natalya via submission to retain the RAW WOMEN’S CHAMPIONSHIP (12:24)

  • The match garnered a “THIS IS AWESOME” chant so the crowd seemed to enjoy it, but I just couldn’t get into the match at all. I appreciated the stuff they did to an extent, but I didn’t believe for one second Natalya was going to pull it off and there wasn’t a lot of drama here. I’m glad others dug it but I’m over it. (**1/2)

Kayla Braxton (I think) interviews Trish Stratus backstage. She calls herself the “Queen of Queens” and talks about how people don’t respect trailblazers like they should. I mean Charlotte Flair is better than Trish ever was so I’m not sure what she’s supposed to admire but okay.

Dolph Ziggler makes his entrance for the next match…but before that let’s get a promo in. Ziggler says everyone is looking at the best damn thing that has ever happened to pro wrestling. Legends come and legends go, but ol’ DZ is always here stealing the damn show. Okay that was pretty good. Ziggler is cut off by the music of Goldberg. However the pyro goes off SUPER EARLY and he barely gets to stand in it. That’s great. I needed a laugh. Also Goldberg is working SECOND on a PPV? Never thought I’d see the day.


Goldberg vs. Dolph Ziggler

Ziggler surprises Goldberg with a Superkick for the 1…Goldberg kicks out. Ziggler superkicks Goldberg again for the 1…Goldberg emphatically kicks out. Ziggler tells Goldberg to get up, Goldberg SPEARS HIM TO AN EARLY GRAVE followed by a Jackhammer for the 1…2…3.

Goldberg defeated Dolph Ziggler via pinfall (1:45)

  • Ziggler surprising Goldberg with two superkicks got me excited but then it turned into a Goldberg squash and that was that. Aw man. Ziggler sold the Spear as wonderfully as I was hoping for though so that was cool. (NR)

Goldberg tries to leave, Ziggler gets on the mic and says that was like getting hit by a little baby and he doesn’t have the guts to fight him man to man. Goldberg makes his way back to the ring and spears Ziggler once again. Goldberg leaves for real and Ziggler asks for the mic AGAIN. Ziggler tells Goldberg that anybody can get lucky twice and that he wasn’t man enough to meet him face to face. Ziggler says that’s why Goldberg is a laughing stock while he’s the best thing going today. Goldberg’s music hits and Goldberg is out here yet again. He helps Ziggler up, teases leaving then gives him a SUPER SPEAR which Ziggler sells beautifully. Noice.

  • Entertaining enough post-match stuff, I’m always down to watch Ziggler oversell. Probably the most entertaining thing he’s done in a long time.

Big E and Xavier Woods show up to hype their man Kofi Kingston in the locker room. Woods is rocking those RICK JAMES BRAIDS and it’s tremendous. Woods says they got Kofi a good luck charm: DRAAAAAAAKE. Just kidding it’s Drake Maverick doing white guy rap sh*t or whatever. He gives up half-way after realizing they lied about R-Truth being here. Maverick says he has more important things to do and walks off. Kingston says tonight is the night he shows Randy Orton he failed to keep him down, that he cannot be held down. I love The New Day so much that even that Drake Maverick stuff is forgivable.

Ricochet makes his entrance for the next match. R-Truth and Carmella pose as part of international announcer row and leave before Drake Maverick shows up in pursuit.

  • R-Truth and Carmella are precious cargo.

“The Phenomenal” AJ Styles [c] [w/ Luke Gallows & Karl Anderson] vs. “The One and Only” Ricochet for the WWE UNITED STATES CHAMPIONSHIP

Ricochet is dressed up Nightwing or something. I don’t know why. I hated it during the entrance but I’m fine with it now.

Styles and Ricochet waste no time teeing off on each other, Styles bailing into the ropes to put the stops to Ricochet…for a moment before he gets clobbered to the floor. Ricochet parkours off Gallows and Anderson to take out Styles with a rana, which is great. Styles focuses on Ricochet’s left leg, attempting to ground the man that gravity forgot by ramming it into the canvas and wrenching it over the middle rope. Ricochet belts Styles with forearms, Styles ducks an enzuigiri but doesn’t duck a back kick to the mush. Ricochet lands on the apron and connects with a kick followed by a springboard elbow for the 1…2…Styles kicks out and Ricochet cradles his knee. Ricochet ducks a clothesline and connects with a leaping neckbreaker followed by a standing shooting star press for the 1…2…champ is still in it. Ricochet powers through his injured knee and climbs the ropes, hitting a sunset flip for the 1…2…Styles kicks out and immediately kicks the bad leg causing his challenger to scream in agony.

 

Styles goes for the Styles Clash, Ricochet drives him into the corner. Styles gets launched to the apron and can’t quite hop the ropes so Ricochet catches him with rights. Ricochet charges, Styles gets his feet up. Ricochet tries a rolling thunder but his knee gives out; luckily he can still pull off a step-up enzuigiri for the 1…2…Styles kicks out again. Styles catches Ricochet in the Calf Crusher out of nowhere, bending back in a very unnatural position, Ricochet creates separation and counters with the ANACONDA VICE! Cue the CM Punk chants. Ricochet connects with a Northern Lights suplex and rolls through with another suplex for the 1…2…Styles gets the shoulder up. Knee apparently isn’t THAT hurt. Ricochet to the apron, takes out Gallows with kick flip moonsault, and heads to the top. Styles crotches him and meets him at the top, Ricochet fights him off then kicks Anderson off the apron. Ricochet with a Whisper in the Wind, Styles catches him and hits the Styles Clash for the 1…2…3!

AJ Styles [c] defeated Ricochet via pinfall to retain the WWE UNITED STATES CHAMPIONSHIP (12:55)

  • Everybody been making it out like Styles and Ricochet were having bangers. This was most certainly not. Don’t get me wrong it was fine, and I enjoyed Styles’ game plan of making Ricochet spend extra seconds to set up his high flying stuff by targeting the knee, and I loved the finish, but this just sorta…happened. *Kevin Sorbo voice* DISAPPPPPOOOOINTED! (**3/4)

Ricochet gets to his feet, Gallows and Anderson drill him with the Magic Killer. The OC pose over their fallen foe.


The Street Profits are backstage at their very first SummerSlam, recapping things we just saw and things we didn’t (the Kickoff special). Y’all you just won me over last night, don’t ruin it. Dawkins tries to shoot his shot with Alexa Bliss, but they’re interrupted by Ric Flair which they beatbox into the scene. They all have a laugh. Ric Flair is a hip hop icon now and that’s crazy to me.


Bayley [c] vs. Ember Moon for the SMACKDOWN WOMEN’S CHAMPIONSHIP

Bayley with three side headlock takeovers to start, Moon counters the last with a headscissors but Bayley easily kicks out of it and doesn’t seem very concerned. Bayley hops over a leg sweep attempt and slows it back down with a standing side headlock. Bayley with a corner clothesline, Moon responds with a corner splash, Bayley responds with a corner knee, Moon with a handspring forearm and a crossbody for a two-count. Cool sequence. Moon drives a knee to the spine followed by a bow and arrow. Bayley sends Moon to the apron, Moon blocks the cutter attempt but misses the second springboard crossbody. Bayley belts Moon with a knee trembler and a clothesline for the 1…2…Moon kicks out. Bayley suplexes Moon and covers for the 1…2…Moon kicks out again. Is the crowd really quiet or is my fan that loud? We will never know. Moon sends Bayley to the apron and charges but Bayley grabs her in a front chancery to kill that momentum. Bayley puts Moon in the tree of woe and connects with an elbowdrop that Moon was nice enough to sit up and take for the 1…2…Moon kicks out once more. Bayley with an inverted Boston Crab (I forget what Colt Cabana calls it), Moon fights out and catches Bayley out of nowhere with a springing rana. Bayley drives an elbow to the spine, Moon ducks a clothesline, kips up, and belts her with a superkick. Bayley rolls to the floor to prevent getting pinned and buy time. Back in the ring Moon hits a bad rana from the middle buckle followed by double knees to the face for the 1…2…Bayley kicks out! Moon fights out of the Bayley-to-Belly, Bayley kicks Moon and Moon catches a second kick, converting to a power bomb that Bayley took on her damn shoulder for the 1…2…Bayley ain’t done yet. Moon to the top, Bayley brings down with a SUPER BAYLEY-TO-BELLY for the 1…2…3.

Bayley [c] defeated Ember Moon via pinfall to retain the SMACKDOWN WOMEN’S CHAMPIONSHIP (10:00)

  • Some jank for sure (and some ROUGH landings) but it was a solid competitive match. A lot more interesting than Styles/Ricochet was, at least. Nice to see Moon get a PPV match and a title shot to boot, she should do better things in the future. I hope. (**3/4)

Kevin Owens vs. Shane McMahon

If Owens loses then his WWE career is over. Owens should just lay down, most jobs don’t give you an easy out like that. After the entrances McMahon gets on the mic and announces that to ensure this is a fair contest he introduces a special guest enforcer: Elias. Gross.

Bell rings, McMahon rolls out of the ring and Elias gets in Owens’ face. McMahon rolls in and tries to use it as a count-out distraction but Owens realizes what’s up and rolls back in. Okay that was pretty clever. Owens chases McMahon around the ring, Elias trips him and they argue again but Owens makes it in at the count of 8. McMahon with his baby punches, Owens responds with adult punches and a cannonball. Owens clotheslines McMahon to the floor and wants to fly but Elias steps in between to stop him since that would be hitting an official and be a DQ. McMahon punches the distracted Owens in the gut and launches him into the barricade from the apron. Owens makes it back in, more baby punches and kicks from Shane-o-Mac. “SHANE YOU SUCK” chant as Owens blocks a whole lot of strikes…except the knee to the sternum which staggers him. McMahon with a side Russian Legsweep, Owens kicks out at 1. McMahon escapes the Pop Up Power Bomb and connects with a DDT for the 1…2…Owens kicks out again. Owens with a Pop Up Sitout Power Bomb but Elias distracts the ref to prevent the count. Elias throws a chair in the ring to tempt Owens, McMahon begging him to do it. Owens refuses, McMahon slaps him and Owens teases again but instead throws it down. Owens argues with Elias and dodges the attack from behind, McMahon knocking Elias out. Owens goes at McMahon with a superkick, a senton, and a frog splash for the 1…2…Elias pulls the ref out of the ring. Arguments ensue, Owens takes out Elias AND THE OTHER REF with a cannonball from the apron. Well goodbye Owens, I guess. Owens grabs the chair, Elias pulls him out and Owens uses the chair on him instead. That’s a SUPER DQ now, man. Owens tosses Elias into the timekeeper’s area and Owens goes to use the chair but the real ref shows up and he hands it to him instead. Ref turns his back, Owens kicks McMahon in the jewels and hits the Stunner for the 1…2…3!

Kevin Owens defeated Shane McMahon via pinfall (9:20 or so)

  • WWE Network feed hiccuped so the match time might be off. Far more entertaining than I was expecting, Owens gaming the system at the end to get the win was great, and made him look like a COOL REBEL or whatever. Owens is riding that Steve Austin wave really well. (***)

-TWO WEEKS AGO ON SMACKDOWN: Roman Reigns almost gets murdered with falling production equipment.

-MONDAY ON RAW: Roman Reigns’ car is hit with a mystery car.

-TUESDAY ON SMACKDOWN: Buddy Murphy snitches that Rowan was there when the production equipment fell.

-EARLIER ON THE KICKOFF: Rowan beat up Buddy Murphy during his match with Apollo Crews for accusing him.


Trish Stratus vs. Charlotte Flair

This is supposedly Trish’s retirement match. Two weeks of build but not much really needed I guess for a marquee match featuring a HOFer and the face of the current-day WWE women’s division.

Stratus with a Thesz press followed by a tilt-a-whirl nothing and a hurricanrana. Flair picks the leg and goes for the Figure 8, Stratus counters with a headscissors and they reset. Stratus sends Flair to the floor, following up with a cannonball kick and a Thesz Press off the apron. Stratus tries to bring Flair in the ring, Flair drops her nose-first on the ring steps. Flair whips Stratus into the barricade and trash talks about how much fun she’s having. Flair rolls Stratus in and kicks her full force in the ribs followed by a face slam into the canvas. Flair keeps the offense going, stopping only to mock Stratus’ taunt (pointing in the air) before wrenching her neck on the middle rope. Flair goes for a belly-to-back, Stratus turns it into a lateral press on the way down for the 1…Flair kicks out and straight decks her in the face. The ultimate pro wrestling move. Flair throws some mocking strikes while trash talking, Stratus sweeps the legs and belts her with a series of rights. Stratus gets sent to the apron, Flair knocks her off with a Yakuza Kick that Masa MY HERO Chono would fawn over. Flair opens the ropes mockingly for Stratus, keeping that trash talking going. Stratus tries to get back in on her own accord but Flair pulls her back in and drops knees. Flair misses the moonsault (DUH), Stratus follows up with a springboard Flatliner and both ladies are down.

Stratus lights Flair up with some chops, Flair kicks her and climbs to the middle buckle. Stratus tries to do the rana, Flair grabs the legs, STRATUS SITS UP and they trade rights before Stratus goes for another rana. Flair holds on and stands, Stratus finally hits the hurricanrana for the 1…2…FLAIR KICKS OUT. Okay that was cool. Stratus blocks a roll-up, Flair makes her pay with another Yakuza Kick for the 1…2…Stratus kicks out! Flair goes to work on Stratus’ left knee and goes for the Figure Four, Stratus counters with a roll-up for the 1…2…kickout. Stratus rolls through and locks in a Figure Four! Stratus then turns it into a FIGURE EIGHT! Nice! Stratus can’t hold it though and Flair gets to the ropes. Stratus connects with the Stratusfaction for the 1…2…FLAIR KICKS OUT AND TRISH CAN’T BELIEVE IT. Both ladies get to their knees and trade chops on the way to their feet. Stratus sweeps the legs into a jackknife cover for the 1…2…Flair kicks out. Stratus ducks the Yakuza Kick and hits the Chick Kick for the 1…2…Flair kicks out again! Both go for a kick but Flair connects first because she has longer legs, then locks in the Figure Four. Flair transitions into the Figure Eight and Stratus taps!

Charlotte Flair defeated Trish Stratus via submission (16:38)

  • I don’t have any particular affinity for Trish’s time in the ring as it was during that awful time in WWE where most of the matches were 2 minute dumpster fires, so I went into this one expecting something meh. I got the exact opposite, this match ROCKED and Trish really brought it, throwing herself into this one and adding moves to her arsenal that I didn’t even know she could do. Flair was a great foil as always, the cocky new queen, and they had tremendous chemistry. Helluva match. The women in this company are stealing shows left and right this weekend. (****)

Stratus soaks in the adulation of the crowd and bids them farewell, off to FOR REAL retirement.


Bret Hart wishes a taped-up Seth Rollins luck in his match against Brock Lesnar.

-RECAP VIDEO: The feud between Kofi Kingston and Randy Orton. Orton held Kingston back ten years ago, Kingston is here to prove he belongs.


Kofi Kingston [c] vs. “The Apex Predator” Randy Orton for the WWE CHAMPIONSHIP

Big E & Woods accompany Kingston to the ring then bail so he can fight Orton man to man. Kingston’s adorable family are in the front row.

Orton offers Kingston one of the pancakes and shoves him. Kingston shoves back and they jockey for position in the corner. Orton throws the pancake at him again and they struggle in the corner. Ref tries to separate them, Orton headbutts Kingston. Kingston drops Orton with a clothesline and hits a headbutt of his own. Orton reverses a corner Irish whip, Kingston climbs the buckles and hits a flying axhandle. Kingston’s flurry of rights are interrupted with a thumb to the eye. Kingston to the top, Orton shoves him to the floor and the barricade. Orton uses the German announce table, bouncing Kingston off of it with a slam. Orton keeps the methodical (read: BORING) offense going as I struggle to give a damn. My love for Kingston is being tested by my equal apathy for The Legend Killer Snake Predator Man. Orton tries to whip Kingston into the steps, Kingston hops over and uses them to launch himself into the challenger. Kingston rolls Orton into the ring, Orton slides right back out. Kingston misses a crossbody and crashes on the floor, Orton follows up with a clothesline and and a slam onto the English announce table, which doesn’t break. Those tablets might be f*cked up though. Orton slooooowly goes for a superplex, Kingston fights him off since he had five minutes to prepare. Orton headbutts Kingston and goes for the superplex again, Kingston pries him off and knocks him off with forearms to the back.

Kingston mounts his comeback with a pair of double chops followed by a dropkick and a leaping clothesline Orton waits patiently to be hit with. Kingston hits the Boom Drop and calls Orton “STUPID!” as he sets up for Trouble in Paradise. Orton catches him instead and connects with a backbreaker for the 1…2…Kingston kicks out. Orton mocks the New Day clap in a very white way (read: no rhythm), Kingston counters the hanging DDT with a backdrop to the floor. Kingston flattens Orton with a trust fall dive. Darby Allin is not impressed. Kingston rolls Orton into the ring and heads to the top for a frog crossbody for the 1…2…Orton kicks out.

Orton connects with the hanging DDT and signals for the RKO. Kingston counters the RKO with a backslide for the 1…2…Orton kicks out. Orton ducks TiP, Kingston with a kick to the face, Kingston with a flying nothing and Orton counters said flying nothing with the RKO. Orton lays laughing, amused at how from outta nowhere it was. Action moves to the floor and IT ENDS IN A DOUBLE COUNTOUT?!? Awww fuuuuu-

Kofi Kingston [c] and Randy Orton fought to a double count-out; Kingston retains the WWE CHAMPIONSHIP (16:25)

  • I sat through Randy Orton’s dull bullsh*t for a f*cking DOUBLE COUNTOUT? No. NO NO NO. NUH-UH. HOW DARE YOU. This match was slow as sh*t and not good and I was bored for the whole thing. (*)

Loud “BULLSHIT” chant from the crowd as Kingston attacks Orton with a kendo stick. Kingston hits Trouble in Paradise and tries to get the crowd to cheer, but they boo because f*ck that finish and this match and what a waste of time.


Finn Balor makes his entrance in all-white. His wiping game must be strong to have that kind of confidence. The Fiend‘s entrance is all SPOOKY and SH*T, with The Fiend carrying a lantern INSIDE AN OG BRAY WYATT SEVERED HEAD. YESSSS. New theme song mix F*CKS too. Balor has NO IDEA what he just saw when the lights come back on.


Finn Balor vs. “The Fiend” Bray Wyatt

Wyatt dominates Balor right away with headbutts. Balor floats over and charges but gets stopped in his tracks from Wyatt bending backwards. Wyatt clubs Balor in the back of the neck, Wyatt then “snaps” Balor’s neck and drills him with a urinage. Balor counters with Sister Abigail with a sling blade and a corner dropkick, plus a standing stomp. Wyatt gets dropkicked into the corner, Balor heads to the top, Wyatt dodges the Coup de Grace and locks in the Mandible Claw for the 1…2…3.

The Fiend defeated Finn Balor via pinfall (3:29)

  • That entrance F*CKED. That new theme F*CKED. The match…was your usual Bray Wyatt stuff but with a scary mask. That’s fine though I actually like Bray Wyatt so I welcome that. (**1/2)

Lights go out and a strobe spotlight shines on The Fiend, now on the entrance stage before going out. Lights go back in and Balor is being checked on by the ref while the crowd chants “THAT WAS AWESOME”.


FEUD RECAP: Brock Lesnar cashed in on Seth Rollins, then beat him the f*ck up so the Rollins coming into the match tonight is a physically destroyed man. OR IS HE?


Brock Lesnar [c] [w/ Paul Heyman] vs. Seth Rollins for the WWE UNIVERSAL CHAMPIONSHIP

Rollins charges at Lesnar, who kicks him right in the taped ribs. Lesnar rams him into the corner and focuses all of his energy on focusing on the ribs. Rollins flips out of a German suplex and hits the Curb Stomp for the 1…2…Lesnar kicks out. OH DANG! Lesnar rolls to the floor and Rollins connects with a flying knee from the apron. Lesnar rolls in the ring and catches a Superkick. Rollins lands on his feet again during a German suplex, two superkicks. Rollins goes for the Stomp, Lesnar counters with the F-5. B*TCH. Lesnar grabs Rollins’ RIB TAPE AND FLINGS HIM AROUND THE RING LIKE A GODDAMN RAGDOLL. Tremendous. Lesnar with three German suplexes, Rollins rolls to the floor. Lesnar stalks him and hits a 4th German on the floor. Back in the ring Lesnar hits a 5th German and Rollins rolls back out while Lesnar bounces with delight. Lesnar picks Rollins up, Rollins escapes and bashes his head repeatedly into the LED post. In the ring Rollins hits a springboard knee, he tries another and Lesnar hits the 6th German suplex of the match. Lesnar takes the gloves off and throws Rollins across the ring with ease. Lesnar with a bear hug, Rollins gets to the ropes and Lesnar clubs him with a forearm. Rollins dodges a charging Lesnar who goes shoulder-first into the post. Rollins dropkicks Lesnar off the apron and into the German announce table and follows up with a pair of tope suicidas. On the third Lesnar catches him and rams right into the post. Lesnar clears off the Spanish announce table, Rollins catches him with a superkick and the big man lands on said table. Rollins takes flight and we got a FROG SPLASH THROUGH THE ANNOUNCE TABLE, GODDANG! Lesnar rolls in, Rollins to the top again for a second Frog Splash. Rollins measures Lesnar and hits the Curb Stomp for the 1…2…LESNAR GETS HIS SHOULDER UP. Rollins goes for another, Lesnar goes for an F-5 but Rollins counters with a superkick and a third Curb Stomp for the 1…2…3!

Seth Rollins defeated Brock Lesnar [c] via pinfall to win the WWE UNIVERSAL CHAMPIONSHIP (13:21)

  • Well goddamn! Match went way longer than expected but in a good way, though it took a minute to get used to because I expect Lesnar defenses to be like five minutes tops. Rollins throwing everything at Lesnar to get the win was nice and he looked like a tough motherf*cker doing it. Not sure they needed him to go in beat up like Becky Lynch at WrestleMania but hey that’s show business, baby. Also confused as to why this wasn’t their WrestleMania match but hey whatever. I enjoyed it, that’s all that matters to me. And you. Because we’re friends. (***1/2)

After a replay Rollins climbs on top of the English anounce table and raises the belt in triumph. SPIN IT AROUND LIKE A COOL HARDCORE KID, SETH! He even gets a pyro show as the event concludes.

*****

FINAL THOUGHTS: A mixed bag to say the least. First hour was dull as dirt till KO/Shane, then Charlotte and Trish stole the show followed by a WWE Championship match that sucked the air out of the room. Air came back for the debut of The Fiend and we got a better than expected main event with Seth Rollins reclaiming his Universal Championship. So there was enough good sprinkled throughout to keep me entertained but oh man those lows were REAL lows. And seriously f*ck that WWE Championship match. Fingers crossed that the reset on Seth’s title reign fares much better. This is his third stint with the title and the first two runs were traaaaaaaaaash, I want to see him actually do something good.

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