COMMENTATORS: Josh Matthews & Madison Rayne
It’s the battle of the McLarge Huges this week on Impact Wrestling as Doc Gallows takes on Madman Fulton in the main event. Also on the show Kylie Rae faces off against Kimber Lee, Rhino helps get Heath one final chance at a contract, Moose confronts EC3, and we get an update on the condition of Rich Swann following the attack from Eric Young last week…and maybe even a little more than that.
- IMPACT WORLD CHAMPION: Eric Young
- IMPACT KNOCKOUTS CHAMPION: “The Virtuosa” Deonna Purrazzo
- IMPACT X-DIVISION CHAMPION: Rohit Raju
- IMPACT WORLD TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS: The Motor City Machine Guns (Alex Shelley & Chris Sabin)
- Taya Valkyrie & Rosemary vs. Kiera Hogan & Tasha Steelz vs. Havok & Navaeh (**1/2)
- Fallah Bahh vs. Crazzy Steve (NR)
- Tenille Dashwood, Tommy Dreamer, Cody Deaner, Brian Myers, & Johnny Swinger vs. Alisha Edwards, Hernandez, Cousin Jake, Rhino, & Heath (**1/4)
- Kylie Rae vs. Kimber Lee (***)
- Doc Gallows vs. Madman Fulton (**)
-PREVIOUSLY ON IMPACT: Eric Young attacks Rich Swann at a rehab facility, The Motor City Machine Guns defeated Ace Austin & Madman Fulton, EC3 throws TNA World Title in the river.
–Moose berates Scott D’Amore backstage for the fact his TNA World Title has been tossed away. D’Amore has no time for this nonsense as he’s waiting on a call from Rich Swann’s orthopedic surgeon. EC3 cuts in, still in possession of the TNA World Title belt, saying when Moose is ready he will find what he seeks. Moose realizes where EC3 is and takes off.
Taya Valkyrie & Rosemary vs. Kiera Hogan & Tasha Steelz vs. Havok & Navaeh
Hogan and Steelz immediately bail to the apron, not wanting any part in starting this match. Navaeh with quick roll-ups on Rosemary, Rosemary responds with a clothesline. Valkyrie tags in, Northern Lights suplex for a two-count. Havok tags in, corner splash followed by a backbreaker into a lariat for a two-count. Steelz finally tags herself in and hits Valkyrie with a running European uppercut, Hogan with a sliding corner kick for a two-count. Valkyrie manages to get the tag to Rosemary, who prevents Hogan from escaping and instead makes her suffer with an Exploder suplex. Navaeh tags herself in, snap suplex for the 1…2…Hogan kicks out. Steelz tags in, connects with a neckbreaker for the 1…2…Navaeh kicks out and Steelz throws a mini-tantrum. Havok gets the tag, clotheslines and kicks to both Steelz and Hogan. Rosemary blind tags in as Havok gets sent to the floor, catching Steelz in mid-air for a fallaway slam. Hogan breaks up the pinfall attempt then hits a tope suicida to Havok on the floor after ducking a clothesline. Navaeh ends up on the floor as well, Valkyrie takes flight and splashes all three, HER F*CKING FACE BOUNCING OFF THE ENTRANCE RAMP. Jesus. Steelz teases going for a splash as well but dances instead, turning right into a spear from Rosemary followed by a double underhook sitout slam for the 1…2…3.
Taya Valkyrie & Rosemary defeated Kiera Hogan & Tasha Steelz and Havok & Navaeh via pinfall (9:16)
- Fun opener to the show. Hogan & Steelz were the MVPs obviously; them talking a big game and always getting their asses kicked is pretty great. (**1/2)
Taya, Rosemary, Havok, & Navaeh stare each other down in the ring, while Steelz & Hogan look on from the ramp wanting no part in whatever voodoo mess that is.
–Fallah Bahh clutches the wad of cash around his necklace, having stolen it from Hernandez last week. He enters the room where John E. Bravo and his Wedding Party (Crazzy Steve, Alisha Edwards, The Deaners, and Johnny Swinger) are hanging out. Bravo complains about the wedding bankrupting him, Steve asks Bahh if there’s something he wants to “get off his chest”. Bahh is offended and challenges Steve to a match later on. Swinger cheers his “young boy” on as Steve does a bunch of random moves and leaves the room. Bravo exits in a huff as well, Cody Deaner asks if they want to rehearse their wedding dance number. No they do not.
- I need to back and watch more Wrestle House stuff, these goofy segments are winning me over.
-Havok is shown backstage when Rosemary materializes. She says she needs an officiant for her wedding and wants Havok to summon Father James Mitchell. Havok tells her she made him vanish from this reality for a reason (wait run that back by me again?) but makes her a deal: if Rosemary can beat her next week, she will help. If Rosemary loses, however, she has to leave Havok alone and Father James Mitchell stays where he is (which is where exactly?).
Fallah Bahh vs. CrazZy Steve
Bahh very obviously clutches the wad of cash under his shirt. Steve asks the ref to check him before the match but he doesn’t find it somehow. Steve then tries a “monkey see monkey do” tactic by taking his shirt off and doing a Johnny Swinger impression but instead he gets palm strikes. Steve goes for the money, Bahh shoves him off and hits a running crossbody. Steve escapes a Samoan drop and ripe Bahh’s shirt off, Bahh frantically covers the money with his hands and gets rolled up for the 1…2…3.
Crazzy Steve defeated Fallah Bahh via pinfall (2:42)
- Not much of a match, more just Steve trying to out Bahh for not sharing his money with John E. Bravo. But still oddly fun. (NR)
–Rhino meets Heath backstage. Rhino tells Heath he got him into the Call Your Shot gauntlet at Bound For Glory and if Heath wins he gets the big contract he tried to get Scott D’Amore to sign last week. He’s also wrestling tonight so Heath rushes off. D’Amore shows up and asks Rhino if Heath knows that Rhino has also put HIS contract on the line if he or Heath don’t win the Call Your Shot gauntlet. Rhino says he doesn’t have to know, then says he’s sure he wants to do this. What a friend.
- Good follow-up to last week’s segment, which I thought was the best part of the whole show. Rhino being a jam up dude, betting on himself and Heath even with his job on the line.
–Kaleb with a K (Caleb Konley) introduces Tenille Dashwood to the ring, adding “ring announcer” to his duties as Dashwood’s photographer.
Tenille Dashwood [w/ kaleb with a k], Tommy Dreamer, Brian Myers, Cody Deaner, & Johnny Swinger vs. Alisha Edwards, Hernandez, Cousin Jake, Heath, & Rhino
These ten are half of the announced participants for the Call Your Shot gauntlet at Bound For Glory. The teams were randomized, with the winning team wrestling for the coveted #20 spot in a five-way match next week. Swinger starts the match doing squats then quickly tags in Dashwood to face Heath. Heath is a gentleman I guess so he tags in Alisha so the ladies begin the match proper, Dashwood embarrassing her opponent with a noogie while cinching in a headlock. Alisha messes a senton, Dashwood hits a sliding clothesline for two. Cody Deaner tags in, Alisha still doesn’t know which Deaner he is and tags in her friend “HORRENDEZ”. I guess her gimmick is not knowing who people are. Soon enough Rhino tags in and Cody marks out, leading a small “ECW” chant. Rhino drops him with a shoulderblock then tags Cousin Jake in to fight his cousin. Cody instead tags out to Dreamer, Hernandez hits him from behind with a knee and Jake tags him in, mad that he made him cheat. Hernandez clears the rest of the other team off the apron, save for Dashwood who is too busy looking at photos on Kaleb with a K’s phone. Dreamer lunges for a tag to Myers, who moves his hand at the last second as they’re enemies. Dreamer tags him in by throwing him inside the ring. Heath tags in and hits a leaping knee followed by a heel kick and a neckbreaker but Cody Deaner breaks the pinfall attempt. Myers hits a Flatliner and measures Heath but then Swinger decides to tag himself in to steal the glory and instead falls victim to the Wakeup Call for the 1…2…3.
Alisha Edwards, Hernandez, Cousin Jake, Heath, & Rhino defeated Tenille Dashwood, Tommy Dreamer, Brian Myers, Cody Deaner, & Johnny Swinger via pinfall (7:18)
- A big ol’ goof of a match that I enjoyed a lot. Lots of fun character moments, Dashwood caring more about her pictures than the match was great. Hernandez didn’t seem like he super cared about losing his big wad of arm wrestling dough. I wonder how next week’s five-way match goes; I hope Alisha wrecks ‘em all. (**1/4)
–Sami Callihan confronts Eddie Edwards backstage. Edwards slaps the phone out of his hand and they start brawling, Ken Shamrock attacks Edwards from behind and applies the Ankle Lock as Callihan records it. They leave Edwards licking his wounds and later on we find out Edwards/Shamrock is a go at Bound For Glory.
- Did Sami Callihan turn Ken Shamrock into his own Kimbo Slice? This is very weird.
–Jimmy Jacobs asks Eric Young about his attack last week on Rich Swann. Young says that no one, Swann or Jacobs or Impact Wrestling, have ever dealt with someone like him before, and vows to go to the ring and get some answers to what’s going with Swann later tonight.
Kylie Rae vs. Kimber Lee [w/ Deonna Purrazzo]
Kimber Lee mocked Susie’s broken arm last week, causing Rae to attack her with surprising fury. Rae snaps off a tilt-a-whirl headscissors and a European uppercut in the corner, Lee bails to the floor and Purrazzo gets in between to stare down her Bound For Glory opponent. Action moves to the apron, Rae hangs on for dear life to block Lee’s attempt to crash them both to the floor with a German suplex. Rae tries a rana, Lee muscles her up and powerbombs her on the edge of the apron, the softest part of the ring. Lee gets in some offense but can’t put Rae away, Rae surprises her with a Kylie Special for a two-count. Rae continues the comeback with a corner cannonball, but Lee rebounds with a Liger Bomb for a two-count. Purrazzo climbs the apron, Rae kicks at her and gets attacked by Lee, but Rae fights her off and rolls her into a Smile to the Finish, switching into the Crossface to get the submission victory.
Kylie Rae defeated Kimber Lee via submission (9:47)
- Really good match, Rae digging into her vicious side more as she heads towards her Knockouts Championship match. Lee rules too. Everybody’s great. (***)
Rae refuses to relinquish the hold, Purrazzo attacks her from behind but Rae gets the better of her and they have a little staredown to sell their Bound For Glory match. Hell yeah.
-The John E. Bravo/Rosemary wedding takes place on October 27th. Oh BOY that’s going to be something, isn’t it?
–The Good Brothers (Doc Gallows & Karl Anderson) make their way to the ring drinking their Talkin’ Shop brand beer. Anderson says they’ve realized they’re the best in everything here in Impact but are missing the Tag Team Titles, Gallows vows to punch a hole right through the targets on The Motor City Machine Guns’ back and vows they will leave Bound For Glory as the champions.
- The Good Brothers have their fans, and a revenue stream from said fans, but they do NOTHING for me personality-wise. I don’t know what it is. They are just very much Not For Me. Get that money, though.
Doc Gallows [w/ Karl Anderson] vs. Madman Fulton [w/ Ace Austin]
Gallows with a big boot to start, Fulton hits a snake eyes and they battle to the floor for a quick countout.
Doc Gallows & Madman Fulton fought to a double countout (1:20)
- BOOOOO-oh wait. (NR)
NO COUNTOUT/NO DISQUALIFICATION
Doc Gallows [w/ Karl Anderson] vs. Madman Fulton [w/ Ace Austin]
Gallows and Fulton fight through the commercial and when we return the show we find out the match has restarted but with NO RULES so these two bulls can keep locking horns. Chaos has been left in their week so far, including Austin who’s been laid out on the entrance stage. Fulton attacks Gallows with a pipe and a trash can, Gallows responds with a chair and a Talkin’ Shop beer. Gallows comes off the buckles with a chair, Fulton kicks it right in his face and wedges another chair between the top and middle buckle. Gallows kicks a chair into Fulton’s face, Fulton charges and sends himself into the wedged chair. Gallows sets up the two chairs and throws Fulton through them with a double chokeslam for the 1…2…3.
Doc Gallows defeated Madman Fulton via pinfall (4:18 shown)
- I’m a sucker for PLUNDAH so I liked this okay. This is the second episode of Impact I’ve watched in a row and the second time Fulton took a pinfall which feels like it goes against his whole “unstoppable monster” shtick. He also has the face of a Hallmark Christmas movie romantic lead so if he ever gets bored of wrestling he’ll have something to fall back on. (**)
Eric Young comes to the ring, refusing to leave until he gets the answer he wants about Rich Swann. He paces back and forth as we cut to Scott D’Amore backstage, looking stressed. His phone rings and he gets the news he’s been waiting on, saying he has some place he needs to be,
Back from commercial D’Amore shows up to the ring, Young asking him to come in and give everyone the “good news”. D’Amore, shocked at who Young has become, says that Swann’s orthopedic surgeon has said Young did additional and substantial damage to Swann last week. Young interrupts, bragging, and then tells D’Amore to tell everyone that he has the night off at Bound For Glory because Swann is a quitter. D’Amore says he has no idea what has happened to Young since they’ve known each other, then goes on to say that Swann WILL be at Bound For Glory and the main event will go on as planned. Young attacks D’Amore until Rich Swann makes the surprise save, showing no signs of leg trouble. Young slides up the ramp, yelling “THIS IS IMPOSSIBLE!” as Swann stares him down, Impact World Championship in hand.
- Good segment here; crazy Eric Young is both unnerving and fascinating. WWE does things to people, man. D’Amore played off his history with Young from the Team Canada days well, and Rich Swann making the surprise save was a welcome way to end everything. Young/Swann build has been good, I would like to see that match.
MOOSE FINDS EC3
Moose pulls up to the same bridge EC3 threw the TNA World Title off of last week, EC3 waiting title in hand and illuminated by the headlights. EC3 says that not one thing about Moose is original, that he’s a pathetic joke. Moose says he’s going to enjoy beating EC3 to death and a brawl breaks out, some dorky song playing in the background. EC3 wins at first, disappointed that his “big confrontation” was so easy. He walks away laughing, Moose gets back up and attacks again, repeatedly punching EC3 off-camera. He leaves with TNA World Title while a bloodied EC3 watches and laughs.
- Was half-waiting for Alexa Bliss to show up in the reflection of the water or something. Interesting segment to end the episode. I don’t know if I’m sold on EC3’s new thing, it still comes off edge lord-y to me but I enjoyed this. Growing on me. I wonder what their “Undisclosed Location” match is gonna be at Bound For Glory; you think we’re getting Impact’s version of “cinematic wrestling”? F*ck it might as well, 2020 is full of it.
FINAL THOUGHTS: Not a great night of wrestling itself save for Kylie/Kimber Lee but it was an entertaining episode that ended with back to back segments that I enjoyed a lot. Impact still feels a little goofy but I’m enjoying the jank and at least there’s some f*cking ENERGY to it. It’s got me hyped for Bound For Glory.
- MATCH OF THE NIGHT: Kylie Rae vs. Kimber Lee
- MOMENT OF THE NIGHT: Rich Swann surprises Eric Young with an attack and a working leg